Starting Small

I called her!
I wanted to see beauty and happiness.

She agreed to meet me for tea! She suggested a beautiful place that serve tea in cute kettles and little cups.
She recommended I take the blueberry muffins, “they serve them hot,” she added.

She looked beautiful and radiant she had this glow around her cheek bones!

“How’ve you been?” she asked
“Sad,” I said
“Why?”

“Life!” I said.

“Are you pregnant?” I asked

She laughed, “I have a gift for!” you she said.
“What did you get me?”
“A book…”

“Why didn’t you call me any sooner?” She asked.
“I didn’t know what to tell you,’ I said.
“But today, today I just wanted to see you, your beautiful self… see that happy smile.
You know, you usually soothe my pains.
Those pains I can not get a hold of!” I told her.

“Pain… How are you doing?”
The pain doesn’t seem to cool off! I told her.

“Went back to see the doctor?”

“Nope!”

“Get serious…”

“I’ve been talking with her, she prescribed something.. said I should be back to normal in a few weeks…”

“What did you want to tell me?” She asked.

“The mystery man! Who is he?”

“Your call… you sounded like you had alot to say!”

“I’m just sad! A sadness I can’t explain!
I feel alone!”

“Him?’
I laugh… “We haven’t been talking.”

“Is it the reason for you been sad?”

“You are my dose of sunshine, my happiness…” I tell her…

“I want to know about him..
Who is he? Why him? How did he convince you otherwise?”

She looks at her phone, scrolls it,then hands it over to me.

“That’s him.”

“What happened to him?’ I ask
“Did you say YES, cause you felt sorry for him?”

“That’s him, my perfect match!”

“Buuut.. his face.”

“What about it?” She asks…

“It’s obvious, it’s dented!
Is it the money?” I ask.

“I make mine so that’s not it! He is beautiful!” she says, a beauty I’ve never seen.

“But his face…”

“That’s where we go wrong..
We place everything on the outside looks and over look the inner self… From how people talk, to how they walk, and mostly how they look!”

“Want to be part of my bridal team?
Wedding is set for November 20th.”

I look at my calendar, “a Tuesday?”

“Yes.. .”

“Venue?”

“By the beach…”

“You really want me to be part of the team? The bridal team?”

“Yes…”

“I can’t! I can’t be part of it, as you start a new journey!”

“You will attend though?”

“Yes… I will but I won’t be on the line up.”

So what happened to his face? I asked.

“He got sick,a tumor grew after it was removed it left him that way.. he currently is in London, undergoing a constructive surgery to replace his face.”

“You agreed to be with him when he looks like that?”

“He is a dose of happiness. When I met him an year ago, my life was in shambles! I wanted to give up! Allow misery to  drown me!”

“Why? What was happening?’

“My first month as a practising doctor was the worst! I watched 10people die! 3 of them it was my fault. I either diagnosed them wrongly or prescribed stronger doses of medicine! Not to mention,my pathetic love life! You know how my family is! Things were extremely bad at home also! And everybody was looking up to me to salvage them! I couldn’t do anything! I was drained emotionally, mentally, socially!

So this one night…
Story for another day.”

“But since I met him, everything has been different! My life and perception to everything!”

“Do you know we create our own happiness?”

“How?” I ask
“By how we react to the situations life throws,” she says…

“I want to be happy again, I tell her!”

“Create that happiness,” she says.

“But how when, when my thoughts are full of sadness!”

“Change your thoughts!”

“I hate him!” I tell her

“That’s where you are going wrong,
You have given him too much power,” she says!
“You let him control your thoughts, this then controls your happiness!”

Start small, she continues!

“Start with the good memories you have of him! The good moments! Write them down! Write the bad memories as well as moments!
Compare the two!”

“Is he worth it?”

“Go do that after!, then give me a call in the morning!” She says.

“I promised you I’ll be by your side!
We are doing this together!
Getting better!”

She hands me my gift, a little book!

She kisses my cheek, “talk in the morning!”

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